Fear Factor

Last night was truely historic.

For many reasons.

It was our last night in China as a family. Today we all hit the plane and head home. The family in Economy - me in Business. Hey... as Seinfeld said - once you've been upgraded - its so hard to go back... And if you've never been up... well... you don't know what you're missing... :)

Actually - my ticket was bought months ago and theirs just recently... and with 911 and all - there isn't the freedom to go back and forth between cabins anymore...

(at least that's what I'm telling them....)

So last night we had a big meal with all of my Chinese co-workers.

Star picked the restuarant this time. Star is very colorful and has been working with me on the editing. She is from Dong Bei - a northern province up near Korea - so she wanted to take us out for Dong Bei food.

It was pouring rain last night - thus difficult to get around in the city. Beijing runs on buses, bikes and subways - but when it rains - everyone wants a cab... and then it takes forever to actually get one. Last time it was raining that hard - I waited in the rain for over two hours till I finally got one.

Last night wasn't quite as bad - only a 30 minute wait.

The place was really cool. Sort of a rustic vibe - everyon was in traditional clothes - and lots of wood. Sort of like a Chinese Lone Star. We were on the third floor in a private room. At the top of the stairs was an old wooden cart being pulled by a stuffed deer. My kids immediately started petting it and wanting to get their picture taken with it.

Once in the room - the first thing I noticed was a big deer head adorning the wall. This was obviously part of the theme. While normally I take no hand in ordering - especially when there is someone who picked the restuarant and knows the cuisine - I did ask the waitress if they had venison on the menu. She said they did - so I had to order some.

Star did pass me the menu - and I also saw something that reminded me of the old Beijing days.

When I was here 98-99 doing our TV show, the American crew had a deal that everytime we ate out - we would order the strangest thing on the menu and everyone would at least try it. This lead to us eating camel, donkey, dog and sheep testicles.

Last night I saw a picture of these grubs on the menu. And I had to try it.

So we ordered it up.

The food was great - and every now and then - I'd grab a grub and shove it in my mouth. Ting Ting and Cho Shang also ate one every now and then. And Chris - Star's husband - ate a bunch as well.

My son kept asking a lot of questions about the grubs. What they tasted like. What they felt like when you ate them. Over and over. I finally gave him one cause he said he wanted to try it. I told him if he ate it I'd give him 5 bucks. He touched it, held it, thought about it a lot, asked more questions - and waved it in his sister face.

Finally - towards the end of the night - he ate it.

And then he started to dry heave.

But he kept it down. Most of it. He did spit out some of the shell. But he got his money.

And then -to my surprise - my daughter picked one up and shoved it down - all of it - without skipping a beat.

So they both walked out with cash in hand.

Bug Money, my son called it.

But it spends just as well as real money...

Now... to get ready for a long plane ride home....

Turning Japanese....

Do you Wii??

So we've made an investment in future technology.

After waiting in Indy for our one and only store - Walmart - to get a Wii - we bit the bullet and bought one here in China.

It comes with the magic chip that lets you play all sorts of fake games that you can buy for the incredible price of a dollar.

But-

as with everything in life -

There is a catch.

Everything on the console is in Japanese. All of it. And there's nothing you can do to change the language except buy a new Wii.

But - the great thing about American ingenuity - my kids already know their way around the machine like a native speaker. They love it.

Which gets to my point.

How great is this thing?

If you like video games - you need to get one. This thing is something everyone can play - and the interactivity makes it that much more fun. Even the simpliest games are really enjoyable.

And you almost exercise while you play. Its really amazing!

On other news:

Nothing back from my actor offer.
Another exec at a nice company read the script and is really into it - has some more ideas on how to get more people involved...

I am sick of editing. I don't want to see another edit room in my life. And yet I still have 2 more days this week and then another 3 weeks next month. I want to cry.

At least I have the wii to come home to....

Oh yeah - and the family....

This one goes out to the one I love....

Back in our Amish phase...
(we all went through it... you know you did...most of us burned the pictures though...)

It's my wife's birthday.

We're all the way over here in China - so it's her birthday 12 hours earlier than normal. My wife was born on her mother's birthday - how weird is that?

In a month and a half - we will be celebrating our 18th anniversary. Pretty strange...:) We have just passed that mark where we have known each other longer than we haven't. More than half of my life has been spent with this lady.

We met in college.

I remember seeing her in the "Who's new" book my Junior year and thinking she looked hot. (She still does...) All of us upperclassmen looking for the young and naive waifs we could approach and corrupt - or - in most of our cases - get shot down by....

My wife came to school with her high school relationship still going. How long did it take for her to end it? Not too long... :)

But the race is run to the swiftest... and in my case - I lost the sprint. She ended up going out with one of my good friends - probably my oldest friend - and I ended up in the "Ducky" role - the friend she comes to when there was problems. And my - how there was problems.

When it all went bad - who was there to fix the mess? You got it - Mr Rebound... :) Give me your defenseless, tired, weak and hurt - has always been my motto...

She just had one weird stipulation - she said she would only date me if I was interested in marrying her...sigh... cut to 18 years later and two kids later. (In a strange twist of fate - that same "Friend" ended up being best man at our wedding... :) Thanks Bill!)

My wife is the most creative, funny, beautiful, sexy woman I know. It has been my honor to have been her friend and husband for these past years. She has stood by me through some really crappy times and supported me and kicked me when I need it as well. While I will always love her - I actually like her as well. I can think of no one I love being around more, sharing things I find funny with, as well as the things that make me cry.

I have no idea how we found each other - but I feel so blessed to have shared in her life.

I can't imagine mine without her.

Happy Birthday Baby. I love you.

Why the Japanese will rule the world

Enough Said.

Hey Shorty... It's your birthday...

We gonna party like its your birthday...

Still in China. Still cutting the same three shows. Still making God Knows how many more changes to the same three shows...

But there is a little bit of action brewing back home.

My old film.

The one that I wrote to direct - moved my entire family halfway across the United States for - raised half the budget for - Got picked up by a mini-major and signed two big stars for - waited for said stars for almost TWO YEARS only to have one of them drop out at the last second and the whole thing crumble to dust around me - leaving me both morally and financially bankrupt....

You know. That one...

In the time since we were trying to get that film up and running - my producing partner has been busy doing real films. Big films. With big stars. And for some reason - he's hot on sending the script out again.

And we're getting reads.

We're not going to the A list guys. But still going to guys who are pretty high up there. Both of the most recent boys have been second leads in two of the big giant franchise films this summer. And they both are good actors.

To the point that we are actually making a money offer to one of them later today.

How ridiculous is that?

Of course - the manager's suggested quote was pretty silly - and we are going lower than that... but my partner was like - here's what we'll offer. I'll make some calls this afternoon and get the money and then make the offer tonight.

And the money is no child's play.

Things have changed.

While the biggest lesson I've learned is to never ever for any reason think a movie is going - even when you're green lit - even when you're sitting and making nice with big actors - even when you're on set - ready to shoot - never for one second think that the movie is going until you wrap shooting. Then you know...

So I know nothing.

But we are back out there. We are getting great response again from that old script. And money is about to be put against it again.

Go freaking figure.

Does make the sun shine today a little bit brighter... :)

Are you ready to Rock?!?

We have seen this hairstyle at least 15 times since arriving in Beijing this trip.

I walk down the street and feel like I'm in a White Snake video.

My wife and I were having a little talk this morning.

Yesterday - the whole family came to work with me. While I edited away - the kids played their PSP's and the wife took a nap. But we went out to my favorite noodle stand for lunch and had a feast.

On the way back - there were a group of workers gathered in front of two shops - a small printers and an ATM. While people were going in and out of the shops - there was a couple workers up on top of the roof - about 2 stories up- and a group gathered on the ground.

The two guys on the roof were busy throwing down large heavy sharp RUSTY sheets of metal to the ground below. No one was telling anyone to not go in and out of the shops. No safety tape was set up. Nothing.

The only warning you would have would either be the crashing of large siler death slapping itself on the pavement - or the screams of victims as they witnessed the large metal objects and they cut through their torsos.

Once the pieces hit the ground - different guys would pick them up and walk away.

This is the funny part.

What disturbed my wife was that they weren't using gloves.

She was worried about the safety of their hands.

I believe I've related the story here of my old Chinese producer friend who - when confronted by an article that said 100,000 Chinese men a year will die from lung cancer starting in 2000- said - Well, there are a lot of Chinese.

Its a different way of thinking, people. It ain't America.

But whatever you may think of the way people think or treat their customers - there is one place where everyone can be a kind for a day.

The Hair Salon.

I took my daughter last night to get her hair cut while I got mine cut. Last time I went here - I filled out a bunch of paperwork and was given a VIP card. So the first thing they do is put you in a big smock and wash your hair.

Like three times.

And give you a head massage.

Then they put on Conditioner.

Then they wrap you up again in new wraps and give you something to drink. And a plate of snacks.

Finally - they start cutting your hair.

And while they cut - a girl stands by with a foam pad to gently brush off the stray hairs that fall on your face.

Once the cut is done - and it's never taken less than 40 minutes - even when you have as little hair left as I do - they take you back and wash your hair again - getting all the loose hair off.

That's what it feels like to be given the VIP treatment. Makes you wanna sing.

As a side note:

Its interesting to see my daughter become a little lady. She is so no nonsense right now. Doesn't think a lot about what she wears - as long as its comfortable. She'll wear some of my wife's T shirts if she can. Doesn't like people to fuss over her. Doesn't like to take a shower or brush her teeth... :) Nothing.

But here - she's enjoyed the attention. She loved getting a massage. She really liked everyone fussing over her getting a haircut - even though she thought the cut was too short - and she even wanted me to get her a dress - tailor made...

What is going on!?!?

Growing up, I guess.

At least she still loves baseball. And computer games. She's still my little girl. At least for now...

Till she discovers Whitesnake....

Pappa said it won't hurt us...

Wow. How the world has changed.
We even have to label the stunts in commercials as dangerous and your car is not meant to be driven that way.

It's been kinda crazy.

I've been coming back and forth to China since 1994 - before I had kids. For the last year, I've been coming back and forth on my own. Now - the wife and kids are here and I get to experience everything again for the first time.

It's been really fun.

Seeing how they see things.
Seeing what they think is gross.
Seeing how they react to things they have never seen.

For the most part - they've done me proud.

My wife is a trooper too.
She is normally a homebody and pretty introverted in new situations. Especially in a culture where she doesn't speak the language - but where everyone assumes that she does and looks to her to speak for all of us.

How strange when it's the white guy who whips out the language and drops some knowledge.

Ivy doesn't like to go out and mix it up with people in Indiana - much less the people in China. But she took the kids to a waterpark yesterday. Even though it was grimy, kind gross and full of bugs - she did it. She said it was almost empty - but they did have a live band playing Coldplay the whole time.

So that made it all worth it.

For her to go - she has to get a magazine that talks about the place she wants to go. Then she has to go over to the hotel and show them the magazine and explain she wants help writing out the address in Chinese. Then she has to go get a cab and show him what the hotel guy wrote - hoping against hope that he will take her and my kids to the right place. And then after they get there - reverse the process to get home.

Any bump in the road and she has no idea what to do. But she did it. A regular modern day Marco Polo if you ask me... :)

The kids were exhausted when they got back last night - but we still went for a walk to have some Thai Food for dinner. We ate outside on rattan chairs - and the waiters brought out big pillows for the kids. They propped themselves up and almost fell asleep.

I sat there thinking that these memories they will have for the rest of their lives. They are probably the only kids in their entire school who have ever been to China. How great to have an opportunity like this.

I hope they remember it.

No longer Forbidden

They may have a 6000 year head start on us - but all it took for my kids to destroy the Forbidden Palace was 20 minutes.

Yesterday was Father's Day - and what better way to celebrate than to visit one of the top world's historical landmarks.

The Forbidden City was constructed in the 1400's and housed about 24 different emporers. Till the last one. And we all know how that ended.

We decided to leave early and try to beat the rush - so we got out of the house about 8 to get there by 8:30 when it opened.

It was a good idea.

By 8:20 I'd say there were at least 1 million tourists everywhere. Or that's how it felt. It was insanely crowded. And getting hot quickly. The whining started before we even set one foot inside history.

The only way I could think to keep them engaged was to say it was like being inside a live action Avatar Movie. That got my son excited enough to start kicking the locals as they passed.

Actually - the kids did pretty good. A lot of the palace is under reconstruction - and it is massively big. We literally walked around it for over three hours. It wasn't like we were stopping and sitting around either. Just walking.

They were hot and thirsty - but hung in there. In the end - I think it will be something they'll always remember. Maybe not as much as the Jacuzzi - but it will be up there.

As far as jet lag goes - they're doing better. They stayed up almost all day - then crashed about 7 last night and slept till almost 7 this morning. That's a new record.

As they all slept - I watched the rest of season two of the Wire - and jumped back into season three. I still say its the best show you've never seen.

Back to work today. Leaving everyone here all by themselves. We'll see how they fare...

A little taste of home

Nothing like coming all the way to China only to fall back on the warm and familiar.

Todays big trip:

Walmart.

We needed groceries. So we all went out in the heat and walked to Walmart.

Chinese Walmart.

Which is just like American Walmart - except with more Animal parts. More stinky fruits. More Tofu. More samples.

We walked over there - about a mile - but with the kids it felt like 10 miles. Jordan explained to me that once, he ran for an entire day. I asked him a few questions about the validity of his statement - and he responded - well, if you don't believe me, I'd like to see you prove it's not true. I smell a budding lawyer. Now I know how Alex Keaton's parents felt...

Jordan was upset all morning about a papercut he got from a popcorn bag and Jade was ticked cause my wife made her wear shoes instead of sandals cause its so dusty and dirty on the roads. Between the two of them, it was like a typoon blowing a set of windchimes that only make a whining sound.

I will say again without hesistation that there is nothing as hard as being a parent. I will take all the changes that the US and China has to offer before I tell my wife to just tough it out.

Last night, while I played ball - Ivy and the kids slept. They all woke up and got moving about 10 at night - where I decided to take them over to a place called THE PLACE. The Place has the largest video screen in the world. Bigger than Vegas. The kids were really excited to see it. By the time I got them all out of the house and over there - for some reason unbeknownst to me -

The screen wasn't on.

They want to try again tonight.

We ended up on a back alley tour of local places near the hotel. We found a great place to eat at 11pm and had salmon and a kind of chicken stew. Afterwards, we bought a bag of small mangoes - about 10 of them - for 2 bucks.

Its hard to figure exactly how far to take the kids on this journey into China. Part of the excitement for them is actually being around their dad for more than a week a month - and part is just being someplace new. But until they're over their jet lag - I'm not pushing them too far or they will start pushing back.

Guess we'll just take it a step at a time.

Step one - Jaccuzi.

Step Two - Walmart.

Step three - ......?

We're putting the band back together!

Family is all here and accounted for.

(BTW - I'm the "big boned" one... )

Picked everyone up at the airport about 530 AM yesterday.

My son was so excited - he literally jumped every step. Not walked. Jumped.

I got them back here to the apartment - and my wife - dead exhausted - fell into bed. Traveling with two kids for 24 hours can do that to you.

I took the kids on a little tour. We had some hot passion fruit green tea at my favorite tea shop. We went and bought a couple more bootleg kids films. We went to the grocery store and got some Mango juice. And we checked out the health club in the hotel.

I asked my kids - if you could only do one thing while you're here in China - what would it be.

My daughter immediately said - The Great Wall!

My son said - Jaccuzzi!

Go figure. His colors bleed true...:)

I took my daughter to work with me and she watched our graphic artist do her magic - wiping out a zit on the chin of one of the actresses... She was quite impressed.

After work - they all crashed in the afternoon while I went down to the gym and worked out. Last night - we went for Chinese and drank a huge Coke - a no no in our house - and then did the very American thing of buying some memory cards for the PSP's.

We got back to the house and - at 10:00 at night - did what any good parent would do. Made a young man's China dream come true.

Jaccuzzi. And he couldn't have been happier.

China Day One. Go figure.

Reuntied...

and it feels so good....

Just got off the phone with my wife. They are getting on the plane in Ft. Wayne.

That means:
27 minute flight to Chicago.
One hour layover.
Four hour flight to LA.
Three hour layover.
14 hour flight to Beijing.
Arrive here tomorrow morning to much celebrating and rejoicing at 5 am.

How cool is that?

I hope my kids don't have continuous breakdowns on the flight so that we can be "those" people with "those" kind of kids...

My son has only been on a plane once - when we spent the summer in Puerto Rico. This is gonna be a really long flight for him. My wife has done the typical - do everything that need to be done in the last 24 hours packing thing - and so she is gonna be exhausted.

And then they'll arrive here completely at odds with the timezone - its exactly 12 hours different - so they are gonna be screwed up. Until its time to go home - and then they'll be great and screwed up at home...

Brilliant!

And please...my last post didn't included anyone in my writing circle. But we all feel the same way under the mask - a fraud and a failure - when we sadly know that so little of what we write actually determines our failure or success.

That's a great idea for a post, David. As a producer and head of development of some major cable series - talk a bit about how little "talent" actually matters when you hire writers...

There's a meeting going on at the post house this morning - so I'm gonna do what I never do...

Actually try to write.

Nachooooooooo!

You can't handle the truth

Does anyone really want the truth?

I know there are times I do and times I don't.

When it comes to any kind of creative venture - the truth is hard to pin down. The truth - more often than not - usually is just opinion. But when the opinion gets echoed by lots of people - its probably getting closer to the truth.

I remember the very first short film I wrote and directed in College with a high school buddy. We turned our dorm floor lobby into a set - moving our rooms in there so that we had the space to film. We did all the editing in camera - reshooting over the top of the previously bad take. We both starred in the film - along with two girls who we thought were cute.

I remember taking it home to show my family - and they couldn't sit through the first five minutes without talking about other things. They never made it through the whole 30.

Later - I made another short. A spoof. Very well recieved. Everyone loves to laugh.

I was so encouraged - I made a film that seems to be one thing - but then turns at the end into something very different. And very depressing. And I remember that no one liked it. And the whole school witnessed this one. I was told later the movie was very popular with the " Oingo Bongo" crowd.

Now - after years of failure and some success - I feel as if I have a bit of a built in gauge against failure. But I also have a team of people I send my stuff to before I sent it out. They are my trusted friends who actually write. We all read each others stuff and try to help a brother out.

When I taught a class on writing - big mistake - I told people to take criticism with a grain of salt. Everyone feels as if they need to say something... and if more than one person says the same thing - you ought to think about it... but in the end - you want to listen to yourself and do what you think is the right thing. No one has spent more time with something than you.

But what if you are blinded by the simple fact that your stuff sucks?

Then you are sliding down a slippery slope.

There aren't a lot of people in this business that fail their way to being writers. There are plenty of producers and directors and executives who took that path - but not a hell of a lot of writers. Its hard work. Disciplined work. Creative work. And in the end - its hard to dish blame on someone else when your name is on the paper.

When I see something that sucks - I really have a hard time saying it. Cause I know how it feels to put myself out there and fail. Even now - when I've made my living doing this for close to 20 years - I hate to have someone start in by saying - there are a few problems....

But what can you do?

Get better.
Try to listen to every criticism without ego or emotion or excuse.
Keep writing.
Read about writing. Watch movies. Read great authors. Spend time coming up with good ideas.

Write. Write. Write.

Rewrite. Rewrite. Rewrite.

Find good friends and help them as they help you.

And each day that you work - you'll find you suck a little less. Or you'll quit.

And that... for better or worse...as much as I don't want to hear it myself... is the truth.

And even I can't handle it.

Nachoooooo......!

How great is this?

A year and a half ago...dear God, has it been that long since I flushed my career down the toliet?...I met with a development exec from New Regency over a pet project of hers. She liked my script and handed me a short story that she wanted developed into a film.

It was a crazy story - written by a great modern author. One whose books I had already read. But it was a crazy crazy story. One that would defy most adaptations. And one that would almost be unfilmable.

We met in this really cool bookstore in Venice Beach. The producer, a really great producer she assigned to work with me, and me. The producer she assigned has gone on to set up films all over the place. He is a great guy and every now and then still throws me a bone - that in my brilliance, I usually let lie dormant until he moves on to someone else.

The bookstore was having a photography exhibit of Luchadore photos. How great is that? In my film- the bad guy had a Luchadore mask.

From what little I understand about Luchadores - they would fight each other - and the winner would unmask the loser at the end of the fight. The older you got without getting unmasked - the greater your prowess and fame.

Fascinating concept. How much do we fear each day being unmasked and the truth of who we really are being exposed? Scary.

Speaking of being slapped in the face with reality - I went to the big Howie B show last night. I got there at 9:30 and the show was to start at 10. I left at midnight and we were still in the middle of the third DJ and no sign of Howie B. The first guy did hip hop - and was cool. The second guy did sort of an industrial sounding techno - and he filled the floor. I liked his music - but just stood on one side watching everyone else.

The third guy had a very stripped down set of mostly beeps and clicks and after about a half hour - I had enough and came back to the apartment. At least I got out of the house.

How sad is it when my mask comes off and all that is revealed is a cynical old man who grows more boring each day...?

Tonight - I'm going to a play! I haven't done that in a long time. Its an original production - written by a girl who works at the US embassy here in Beijing. It's called I heart Beijing. We'll see how she does - but it sounds fun.

Maybe I'll go as a Luchadore.

Lost in Translation

I can never figure it out.

I'm certainly not Scarlett Johansen - the young photographer's wife - left alone and adrift in the big city.

And I'm not Bill Murray - the aging actor, shooting a product he doesn't care for - hanging out in hotel bars....

Oh yeah... wait a minute... I do have the aging part down...

All I have to say is - thank God for Veronica Mars and bootlegs from China...

Almost done with Season three now. Still trying to figure out what the CW has against great characters and smart writing. It does make me smile - even when I've been locked up in my apartment all day.

It's Saturday here. I've been here almost a week.

We've been revising the old show. The one that was supposed to be done. But it's not.

I actually sat and counted how many levels of approvals I have to pass per show.

Three managers in San Francisco
One manager in Los Angeles
Three managers in Shanghai
Two lawyers in Los Angeles
Two lawyers in Beijing
One Commercial regulating agency in Beijing
Every single TV station we air on.

That's right. Different than America - every TV station has a right to edit content as they see fit. And they all have different internal regulations. So we get to do a new cut for EACH AND EVERY ONE.

We're getting closer to the end of the food chain.

We've passed the first 5 steps. We should have a new cut for the regulating agency this week. We shall see.

In the meantime - the new show is sort of festering. Doing nothing. Like me.

I did go play ball last night - against my better judgement. My knee has really been acting up. Getting old and my body is turning against me. But there were a lot of people. More than have ever been there. It turns out we had enough to field two teams - so I only played every other quarter - and my knee did fine. It hung in there enough to let me walk back home.

It was so nice not be stuck in an editing suite all day that I did myself one better and stayed in the apartment all day watching my own TV. How's that for living it up in the big city?

I'm coming up on my one year anniversery of traveling back and forth to China. Sigh.

My family does come here this week. Should be exciting. Even though I work all day - it will be such a great experience for the kids. Something new and something they'll always remember. I hope.

Tonight - I am breaking my self imposed exile from the real world.

A club within walking distance of the hotel is hosting Howie B - who produced for Bjork, U2, Massive Attack and Garbage. While I am not the club going type that I once was - it will at least be diverting. And it gets me out of the house...

But first... another episode of Veronica Mars...

Everytime I think I'm out...

They puuuuuullllll me back in.

So I guess I just thought I was done.

Oh yeah... I'm back in China.

Went in yesterday to start back in on my new show - when I found out the old one still has a lot of work. It's not enough to get clearances from SF and LA and Shanghai - we also gotta clear the Commercial board of China - and legal - and then every individual station.

So its almost like starting over.

New graphics.
New voice over.
New rules.

And - like the domino it is - it all effects my next show.

Did I say how much fun this is?

On the cool side - at this time next week - my family will be on their way here. I think. My wife called the passport place today to make sure everything was on the up and up and they said the kids stuff was in process... but did she send her passport? My wife reminded them that she did... and they did the real quick...

yeah... um. let me call you back....

and never did.

So I hope that they will be on their way.

And one more - for all of you who've been around since my movie fell apart...

It still lives!

Talked with one of the producers last week. He was sending it out to some more people. We hit one of the names that has been top of my list for awhile - since the beginning really - and told them about the project and about our troubles with a certain actor. Funny - they said - we went through the same thing with him on another project. Go figure. So they're reading the script now.

As well as others.

We talked about scaling back and trying to do it for pennies on the dollar again...

I just want to do something else... so that sounds deliscious to me... but I'm not counting any chickens.

Funny to think that two years ago - while I was slowly starving and putting in all that work - I had a film green lit and ready to go. Now here I am in China - and yesterday I got a call from Shawn - my longest producer - who was in Norway -making real bank.

The world changes and the world stays the same.

Back to the world of ridiculous change though. Gotta start cutting again... :)

Dentist, Day 2

My Dentist don't mess around.

I arrive - and he has me in the chair within two minutes.

There is a sticky note on the instrument tray that has my name and exactly what he needs to do.

By minute three - there are two Q-tips full of mysterious gel sticking in my cheeks where I am about to be given shots.

By minute 5 - Dentist grabs his giant needle - and jerks my head to the side while he says the same thing he said yesterday - "Doesn't hurt as much when you go slow. Don't worry. We haven't killed anyone....this week."

I don't smile. His fingers are in my mouth.

Then he leaves.

My dad says he goes to his office and plays video games. I wouldn't know. I sit still for 3 minutes - letting the drugs run their course as I fight back the panic.

Then he returns and starts the drill.

I made some sort of mistake. I had the new Arcade Fire CD playing on my ipod. And it just wasn't loud and continuous enough to block out the sound of the drill. I quickly started scanning through the artists to try to track down the new Spoon CD.

Whoops.

He tried to shove the drill in - and I said something like...

Wahhha mimmmmummm

I meant to say

Wait a minute...

He sat back, exasperated.

"Hurry up. We're on a schedule here!"

Wow. Superdentist must have been in a real hurry to get back to that solitaire game.

I found Spoon - closed my eyes and went to my happy place.

I was in and out in under 30 minutes.

He's McDentist. Faster than the speed of light.

Silly really.

Came home and passed out again. Woke up in time for the art show at the place where my daughter takes lessons. The artist has a gallery on the lake - and teaches two adult classes and one kids class. My kid was the only one showing tonight.

She is really great - as any good parent would say... :)

But the thing I love about the class is that art is more than putting pen or brush to paper... its about how you see the world. Just to think of things in terms of color and shadow - it opens up a lot. Don't know if she will stick with it or not - but I love to see how she processes what she learns...

And Cleveland kicks Detroit in Game 5. Double Overtime. How you like that?

Back to writing.