What is it about this guy?

It's nice! I like...

This is the first four minutes of the Borat movie - scheduled to open up next weekend.

My my.

There is another deleted clip out there where Borat and his producer are pulled over in an icecream truck by the police. Borat apologizes that "if they have to search inside him" it will be bad because he ate 13 cinnabons the night before and his anus looks like "a tired dog's mouth."

Sigh.

I can't seem to get enough of the guy - even if he is everywhere - repeating a lot of the same jokes. They still make snot come out of my nose whenever he says something crazy.

Reminds me of a friend of mine.

A lot of people go to film school to be a big director. A few as producers, a few as writers. But I remember in my production class - when asked who wanted to be a director - every single hand went up. And my teacher said - maybe two of you will ever make it.

I thought he was an idiot.

He was wrong. Only one every did. Me. Not to brag. The class wasn't that impressive.

Nobody went to film school to be something but the best. But those who survived and worked in the business sometimes took a different route.

One of those guys was Randy Pease.

Randy wanted to do what everyone else did - direct - but saw very quickly that most people were delusional. Randy decided that he wanted to work. While the rest of us hid away in rooms writing scripts that never deserve to see the light of day - Randy shifted his focus to the sound department.

He became a boom guy. For those of you still in the dark as to what that is - its the guy who holds the very long stick with the mic on the end of it.

Randy hooked up with a really good sound guy - and pretty soon - he was working on big features. Super Mario Brothers, Most Steven King shows, all Terry Gilliam movies, a lot of Joel Schumaker films.

Randy worked on the movie version of Buffy the Vampire Slayer - and had Kristy Swanson chasing him - even though he was married. (For all you single writers out there - funny works. And the best way to get a girl? Ask them out!)

I remember sitting down with him - questioning him incessantly about the "big show." What was it like on set. How were the actors. What about this director?

Randy is probably one of the funniest guys I know. To this day - anyone who knows Randy quotes lines from him.

He reminds me of Borat.

He has the same jokes - told again and again - but everytime I hear them - I shoot something out of my nose and choke.

When I was on set with John in LA last week - he told me he had just finished shooting a trailer with Randy in Virginia. He said at wrap - Randy was going up to everyone on the crew going:

"Don't feel bad. It's not your fault. You did the best you could."

Another famous Randy line... Told as if he's talking on his cell to the producer...

"Tired? No... I'm not tired. Oh.... Fired....."

OR

"Long underwear? I thought you said to wear Thong Underwear...."

See? Silly. But in the heat of the moment - on set... It's stinking funny. He usually unleashes those at the most inopportune times - when things are starting to get really tense -

Once I was directing for Ghost Stories - that horrible Twilight Zone style show - and the exec producer and I are at the monitor - with our comdexes on - and Randy is booming the show. Between takes - he would take the mic like a sports announcer and give a running DVD commentary on the action to get the shot up and running.

I remember the exec - a very humorless guy - with tears running down his cheeks - trying to hold it in - and me waving the AD to call action because if I opened my mouth I would blow it.

Where ever Randy was on the set - usually grabbing something at craft services - when they would ask if sound was ready - he would yell - "Speed!"

His other battle cry when they would call for him - as he walked larconicly back to set:

"Flying in at flat rate speed."

The first time I took him to Taiwan - he would ask his translator all sorts of questions - like:

"What do you call this?"
"A tree? We call that Shu"
"See? Now why can't you just call that "tree?" It'd be a lot easier..."

Shawn complained about getting bit out in the rice field one day. He said he was eaten up by chiggers.

Randy casually replied:

"Shawn. They prefer to be called Chegros."

And for one last story that always makes me smile.

Randy worked on the Contender with Jeff Bridges and Gary Oldman. One day, between takes - Gary was standing off by himself - practicing his lines.

Randy walks casually over and leans against the wall next to Gary. Doesn't even look at him. Just says:

"Hey Gary. Just wanted you to know. That fake English accent? Not fooling anybody."

And walks away....