My Take on Takes

If you are unsure whether or not...:) you can't make that stuff up...

Funny thing about Hollywood. People may say that you are whoring yourself out - but the biggest difference between a prostitute and a loose woman?

The prostitute gets paid, baby....

So here is a funny thing I discovered when I was in LA. First of all - no one really wants a spec script. Sure they sell - if they are genius. But not that often. And here is the reason why. Because they are done. Or just about done. All that is left for a spec is for people to pick up their red pens and mark it up - because it is a finished product. It can be more or less - but there are way more reasons not to buy it than to buy it.

The way producers make money is to get deals. And how do they get deals? By setting stuff up. And what seems to be getting set up are short stories, books and articles. Almost every meeting I went to, people were asking me if there was a piece of material that I might want to develop.

The reason seems to be this: In a short piece, there is promise. Wow - this could become a movie. Let's see where this goes. Let's get a writer on it...

Which leads to my next step: THE TAKE.

Phil Morton has an incredible post again today about breaking story:

http://www.screenwriterbones.blogspot.com/

And, if you write, you have to agree - breaking the story is the hardest part. Sure being disciplined is tough, sure there are many things to whine about - but it is all mute unless you have a good story. I love breaking the story. I love coming up with ideas. I'm a genius at putting the big set piece right where it will distract the reader from my egregious lack of actual content in my story. But this part is tough. It takes time and sweat and blood.

And this is what Hollywood wants you to do. It's called a "take." They give you an idea and they want you to come up with a "full take," meaning - the entire movie. The whole story. Do all the work. And here is the kicker...

THEY WANT YOU TO DO IT FOR FREE.

At least at my level. So someone reads your script. Prays that you can write. And then they ask you to break a story for them based on one of their ideas. And so off you go - and spend three months breaking a story - and come back and tell it to them. And they go something like this -

Oh. That's not what I meant.
Oh. That's too close to the original. I thought you would make it your own.
Oh. That's really far from the original. I don't know if we could take that to the studio - its so different.
Oh. It's really good. I just don't know about the end.
Oh. Wow. You really did a lot of work on this. But something just isn't right. Let me think about it and get back to you....

So you go back to your story and do it all again. And the whole time - you realize that there are other writers out there, doing the same thing with the same idea - and you are all doing it for free... And its crazy... :)

My mom always said - wow. I can't believe you don't get paid anything for this.

And I tell her - that's why they created a Writer's Guild. Or - one day when I'm famous - I'll really have reason to get angry about doing this for free...Because I think this is just part of the process. But the better you are - the more seriously your take is taken. I think?

Now granted - I'm sure there are writers out there who are great at coming up with bare bones ideas and are able to pitch studios a sketch version of their idea and get everyone on board and excited.

I admit that I am still a little too excited about the process. When I pitch - I give them the whole ball of wax - when all they wanted was a dripping. They want an idea with legs - and I give them the whole creature. So there are many reasons to pull out the pen and mark it all up.

But when you are starting out - every time someone wants to hear you pitch - or come up with an idea - you jump. And you do the heavy lifting. Cause one day, you might actually get paid to develop something.

One day - you might actually grow up from a loose woman to a full fledged prostitute.

And that is what I love about this country. You can see your dreams come true if you sleep around enough...

(and for those of you who are unsure if you are a prostitute or not, ask one of our friendly guards...)